We believe

Tuesday might have been the worst day of my life, but last night was definitely the worst night. I called at 10PM to get an update and they told me that Mom “had a pupil change,” was unresponsive after 3 hours of no sedation and was being rushed to CT. This news was scary and devastating. They told me they would call me back and to wait until they had results. For a full 45 minutes Grannie, myself, Claire, Aunt Karen and Aunt Kes prayed out loud for Mom. We begged the Lord to make this not true and to continue to command healing over her body.

Soon after, we got the call that the CT scan was clear and normal!!! PRAISE THE LORD! He is GOOD ALL THE TIME. I can’t sing his praises enough. When they got her back to the room, the doctor said he felt confident it was metabolic acidosis. They said they were going to run more labs and possibly start dialysis. Mom was suppose to get dialysis yesterday but never did because she began producing urine on her own. This morning, the heart transplant team told us that they decided dialysis wasn’t needed because her kidneys started producing good urine and her creatinine levels looked better. Nephrology doesn’t think she needs dialysis and we are thankful for that miracle.

The doctors told us they are sure that she has some sort of underlying infection somewhere, but infectious disease hasn’t found it yet. They are treating her with new strong antibiotics, and if that‘s what is causing all this we should start to see some improvement once the antibiotics start working.

Aunt Kes spent the day with her. This morning when she went in she was discouraged because Mom was not on sedation and couldn’t be aroused. This afternoon the NP called to tell me that Mom’s heart rate had come up and she had started moving her head from side to side. She was also opening her eyes and had started to bite the tube in her throat. They were encouraged by this and feel like once her metabolic numbers get more normal, her head should clear and she should become less foggy. They decided to restart the sedation to help keep her comfortable.

Mom has a very long road ahead of her. She’s still very sick and still considered critical. Tomorrow we have a family meeting with her doctors to discuss her case and what‘s ahead. Please pray for that meeting and for the doctors. I know they are so tired of us bugging them for updates and begging for the updates to be good news, but she’s our sweet Mom/daughter/wife/Lollie/sister/Cookie and we need her.

Please continue to pray for Mom. Specifically for whatever infection is causing all of this to go away. Pray that her heart would get stronger by the minute, her kidneys would continue to work and her liver function would improve drastically. Please also pray for her to have peace. Whatever happens, I want her to be comfortable and without pain.

When I originally started this blog, it was to keep everyone updated with her LVAD journey and share the story of the Lord’s goodness in her and my life. Still, two years later our story is the same. Mom is still One Tough Cookie and the Lord is still Good. He’s continuing to hold her, love her and heal her. Mom has had a rough two years and I can’t pretend to act like I understand why this continues to happen to her. I do know, that no matter how rough the path, the Lord continues to prove everyone wrong. As soon as I feel desperate and hopeless, He does something else to remind us that no matter how difficult the task, He’s got this. I believe that right now, in this very moment, He is speaking life into her heart, lungs, kidneys, brain, liver and every inch of her body. I believe that he’s standing next to her bed holding her hand and whispering in her ear “I’ve got you Kim.” I believe He’s filling her mind with sweet dreams of a life with no more pain and no more sickness. I believe that He’s not done with Mom and her story is NOT ending here. No matter what comes next, God is on the throne, He is the great physician, and He is in control. My family will cling to that hope and faith each and every day. Will you?

We need a miracle

I don’t think I’ve had a worse day than yesterday. When I got to the hospital yesterday morning, I was shocked to find Mom surrounded by doctors and not herself at all. She was bleeding from her nose and mouth. She was hardly able to respond to me. She looked rough.

Although she was breathing fine on her own, the doctors asked for my permission to electively intubate her. They wanted to do this because they were concerned she wasn’t awake enough to protect her airway. They were concerned that she was going to aspirate on the blood in her mouth and throat. So, by myself, I made the hard decision to intubate her. They also told me that she wasn’t creating urine and that her kidneys were shutting down. They needed to put in a dialysis line so they could run dialysis. They said the right side of her heart wasn’t working properly and in return was causing congestion in her liver. So many scary things were thrown at me and I was told by nurses and doctors that this might be the end of Mom’s journey here on earth.

I was encouraged to call the family to come to New Orleans so they could be close. Although I was with Mom from 10am-6pm yesterday, I only got a good 30 minutes of alone time with her because her day was spent surrounded by doctors. I spent the whole thirty minutes praying over her body and asking the Lord to speak life into each one of her organs. I begged Him to heal her. I begged Him to give me more time with her.

By the time 6PM came around and I was kicked out of the ICU, I could hardly walk to the Brent house hotel that’s connected to the hospital. I was emotionally and physically drained. I spent the day alone, trying to process what a life without my Mom would look like and it was tragic and heartbreaking. I just don’t know how we got here.

Mom is still very critical. She is in no way out of woods, but she did have some slight improvement overnight. She has started to produce some urine and her blood work looks slightly better. Her INR came down and is in a good place. We are thankful for any improvement no matter how small it is. Overnight her lactic acid jumped up which can be a sign of sepsis. They have started her on different antibiotics and antifungals if that’s the case. Please pray it is not though. I’m believing it’s not.

Today’s plan is to start dialysis to help her kidneys out. We need to give them a break and make sure she doesn’t have a build up of toxins. The nurse told us that she is on the lowest ventilator setting and that they extubate people on that setting all the time.

Please pray for her y’all. More now than ever. Yesterday was so grim. It was awful. I need my Mom, my sisters need their Mom, my kids need their Lollie and our family needs a happy ending. For the next few days we will be staying down in New Orleans to be close to her.

Please pray that we see significant improvement through today and tonight. My Mom needs a miracle. If you know her story, you know the Lord has done it more than once before. He’s made ways when there was no way.  He’s healed her body when every doctor said it was impossible. I’m standing here in full faith that he’s going to do it again. Will you please stand with me?

We are the Storm

Frustrated doesn’t begin to explain how our family is feeling right now. On Thursday of last week, we got the exciting news that Mom was going to rehab. We packed her stuff and got her moved. Yesterday morning, Grannie was headed to the rehab hospital in NOLA to stay the day with her when we got the call that she was going back to the hospital.

Yesterday was an awful day for my Mom. They transported her by ambulance down the street and when Grannie got to the emergency department, they refused to let her in. No advocates for adult patients. The most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. Poor Mom, she went the whole day without food and water. Grannie spent the whole day sitting outside the hospital waiting and we never got an update. I spent most the day on hold with the hospital trying to get updates and still, 36 hours after her being brought to the ED, I haven’t spoke with a doctor.

The only update I can really give you guys is to please pray for her platelets, INR and liver. Pray that her Platelets would rise, her INR lower and her liver be healed. I’m honestly at a loss of what is causing this to happen. I need the doctors to find the answer. I need the Lord to give them the wisdom they need to diagnose and treat her. I need the Lord to slow their minds and make them aware and alert of her illness.

Mom is struggling with being alone. It’s so sad. She’s not your typical adult. She’s very sick and ever since her initial complications, she’s not able to be independent. She feels very helpless. On top of all that, the low platelets and high INR are causing her to have some pretty serious confusion. She will look at you one minute and be clear as day and the next say something completely off the wall. It’s crazy and frustrating for her and us. Please pray for her mind and ask the Lord to fill her with peace.

I’m also going to ask you to pray for me. I don’t often ask this, but I’m really struggling. I’m scared, mad, tired and honestly just overwhelmed. I need my Mom so bad. It’s been more than 6 weeks since she’s been home in Baton Rouge. Six weeks without my Mom and my kids Lollie. We miss her dearly. We can’t live without her. My heart is broken for her and our family. Lord, please let this nightmare end. Please heal Mom.

Lastly, I want to ask you to also pray for my sweet friend’s Dad, Mr. Ralph Walker. He’s been in the hospital fighting for his life for 2 weeks now. He was diagnosed with COVID and is on a ventilator. Like Mom, he needs a miracle. He needs the Lord to heal his lungs, heart and kidneys. He needs strength to continue to fight and like our family, his family needs a renewed peace that surpasses all understanding. His family is my family and the last few weeks have been hard for all of us. When so much like this is going on it’s easy to get discouraged and ask why? Why does this have to happen to two families that I personally think are two of the most faith filled families I know. I actually had that exact thought tonight and as soon as I thought it, it was answered for me. Because we are surrounded by an armor that can withstand it. We have Jesus. We have the faith, hope and love He brings. Just when the devil tries to convince me that we can’t survive the storm... I remind him that We are the storm and we are storming heavens gates with Praise knowing and believing that what we have asked for has already been done.