This morning after dropping Eleanor off at school, I had a really difficult moment. I questioned the Lord and honestly I asked Him why He wasn’t doing more? Why is this our story? If you know my family, then you know they have been faith-filled believers for generations. They have loved the Lord all of their life and never has their faith wavered. It seems like recently that it’s one thing after the next over here. We can’t win. As soon as we feel like we are back on our feet, it’s something else. Why does the Lord not reward our faithfulness? Why doesn’t He completely heal my Mom? Why isn’t she home now? Why is our family struggling with so many different things? It feels unfair. As I’m driving this morning, I whole heartedly know that the Lord gave me a word.
“But what if healing isn’t your story?”
What if your story is to show unbelievers that even when you’re not healed, you still worship? What if your story is showing the world that even when prayers aren’t answered the way you hope they would be, you still give praise? What if your story is sharing that the gift of eternity is greater than any miracle we could receive on earth? So many people can tell a story of a miracle that happened and how their life went right back to normal. They give the Lord the glory for their healing and it’s a beautiful story. But, how many people tell a story of heart ache and constant struggle while giving God praise? To show people that we can be patient with our suffering here on earth because we know we will spend eternity with no suffering. Maybe this world doesn’t need another story of miracles, but a story of a family that suffered and still believed and gave thanks to Jesus. It’s so humbling to think of what the Lord has already given us. Forgiveness and the hope of eternity is enough. So why do we constantly ask for more?
I still believe my Mom can be healed. We have witnessed miracle after miracle with her in much darker times. Today’s struggles aren’t nearly what they were 4 years ago. Mom’s lab work honestly looks good. Her kidney function is great, her LVAD is working beautifully and nothing on paper shows that she should be critically ill. If you see her, though, you would see her struggling. Her anxiety is terrible from being stuck in a bed for so long. She has an ileus from the serious abdominal surgery that she’s recovering from. She’s still having pain from the surgery incision and things have not quite settled with her belly. She needs your prayers. She is fighting and wants to live. In fact, she made it clear to us yesterday to “not let her die”. Please pray for her team of doctors as well. Please pray for them to have patience with her and us. Please pray for them to not give up on her. Mom’s health has been such a long road and it’s easy to look at it from a whole and be overwhelmed. Mom’s story is not over. Although her healing and miracle might not have come the way we originally prayed for it to, she’s still got work to do.
